That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
