shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
I think your dad took our porno
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
Randomize
