Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
I yelled at your uterus for you.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
