You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
Randomize
