google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
Help. Why am I so naked?
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