I'm eating all of the evidence.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
