"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
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