don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
Randomize
