I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize
