Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize
