I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
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