ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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