Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
it's great music for shaving your balls
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
Randomize
