I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
