She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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