Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
Randomize
