I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
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