Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
Randomize
