not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
So much Jack, so little girl.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
Randomize
