someone threw a dead crab at me
He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
