google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
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