all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
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