Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
