i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
Randomize
