Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
Randomize
