you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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