Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
It's blow job season.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
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