they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
