Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
The struggles of a small town man whore
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
Randomize
