Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
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