They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
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