This dress was meant to end up on your floor
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Randomize
