What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
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