I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Randomize
