Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
