Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
Having Father’s Day on Pride weekend is always so awkward. “Hey dad just calling to say I love you.” While I’m navigating my way through a pop up pool at a bar riding a penis floatie. Happy Father’s Day.
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