You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
Randomize
