By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Randomize
