operation harelip BJ is a go
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
Pants are for mortals
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
Randomize
