My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Randomize
