I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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