can we get nightvision for the apartment?
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
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