so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Randomize
