i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
Randomize
