Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
Randomize
