I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize
