so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
Randomize
