wrigley field is MILF paradise
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
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