omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
Randomize
