i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
