Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
Randomize
